I am an Ordinary Woman!

I’m an ordinary woman… I have curves like most women and there are parts of my body I’d like to change if I could but I’m happy with what I’ve been given. I have a warm smile and I know I have warmth in my heart because I can feel it. I see the world through bright blue eyes but how I see the world is my very own Uniqueness - as it is for every woman.

I often make mistakes, sometimes over and over again until I eventually understand the universe is trying to tell me something and I eventually get the message - the valuable learnings, so I can move forward.  I have a tendency to attract the ‘mack truck’ kind of experiences - you know, the ones that hit you smack bang right in the face, hard and it hurts like hell.  I’ve started to learn much more quickly and read the signs now before I get run over. I hear the voice within, feel in my senses and my intuition but I don’t always listen…

I strive to be the best parent I can be and struggle not to blame my parents for fucking it up for me. I remind myself they taught me what NOT to do as a parent, so I’m ok, I know they did the best they can and for their efforts, I am grateful. My kids love me unconditionally and while it’s not always easy, we manage and we have a lot of fun. Like most mums, I’d do anything for my children and can’t imagine my life without them, they are the teachers, they are the wise ones in my world.

Every day, a little bit more of my heart is forgiven for leaving my marriage instead of sticking it out and working it out. Every day I send him love and hope my childrens father doesn’t hate me for changing our family.  And every day I am grateful I have had the opportunity to explore who I really am as a woman since then.

Throughout this journey I have taken on my own, I’ve learned many things and experienced even more… Who I am, what I want, what I am capable of and what I am not. I’ve discovered who my real friends are and who is most important to me and what it means to be a girlfriend - loyal, strong, nurturing, compassionate, happy! I’ve decided I’m still learning how to be a great girl-friend.

I seek no validation, nor fame. I want freedom to be me, as a warm hearted mother and spirited lover. I desire the peace of mind that comes from speaking my mind and being present with my emotions. I want freedom to be emotional without excuses or hiding behind a veil of bravery - for I know my strength comes from my ability to release, realise and accept how I feel.

What I want for myself is a sense of knowing that I am equanamous with mother nature and that I am the same life force that thrives in her.  The feeling that I am indeed, powerful beyond measure but I don’t always feel that kind of power… In fact, sometimes I feel completely powerless and full of pain.  When I watch TV or see the atrocities that are committed in the world against women and children, I realise I am not alone, we women have a long way to go till we are free… Free from what? Ourselves and the walls we have built over centuries of hiding and denigration?

We no longer have the fear of burning at the stake - at least not in this country but we still live with fear - fear of being a deeply loving sexual goddess, fear self of expression and speaking our truth, even if our love is at risk. I’m an ordinary woman, I want what every woman wants - to feel like a woman one who can and does harness the power of the greatest mother of all - mother earth.

Every now and then I get a glimpse of  mother earth connection and it brings me back down to earth, literally pulling me down to the core of who I am, the core of the earth.  I am most grounded and at peace when I am connect with the core. My connection with the earth mother makes we want to run wild and naked through the woods howling with joy and a sense of freedom - but if I did that, run like the wolves, would I still be an ordinary woman?

I don’t want to hide behind the cloak of that which I have created but to not hide, leaves me open to explore uncharted territory… Do I dare go where the wise women before me have gone? Do I reach up, reach out, speak up and dare to shout out from the roof tops what I actually want… Do I even know what that really is?

I wonder if other ordinary women feel the same as me? Do they too want to scream from the roof tops and be set free? Do they KNOW without a doubt, of the feeling of wonderment, wildness, willingness and wisdom that resides within their heart and have they too lost their key to unlock the mysteries of womanhood?

Do other women want more from life, to unleash the suppression that lies heavy in their hearts? Do they know the great love of source and  spirit resides within them?

I am an ordinary woman, but I FEEL so much, so deeply, with complexity that leaves me bewildered, enriched and sometimes confused and scared. I FEEL so much love and yet, shy away from the love of others. I play a dance of openness and close up when it’s not comfortable for me to be so vulnerable.

I know how to surrender and open myself to vulnerability, I understand my strength when I am vulnerable and open like a flower… But if I question myself, do I really know how to fully surrender? Would I have not run like the wolves by now? Would I have not spoken up and stood out and shouted from the roof tops, my hearts desires?  Would I have not challenged this very world we women live in?

Would I have not screamed my fucking lungs out, with the greatest intensity during a session with my lover? If I was supposed to be fully surrendered, why would I have ever held back?

I am an ordinary woman, I live with passion and wishes fulfilled, I have desires and hopes and some of my dreams are so far, left unfulfilled… Marianne Williamson said it best in her book ‘A return to love’, we are powerful beyond measure, when we shine our light, we give others permission to also shine….

So anything less than me being EXTRAORDINARY, isn’t me being myself, isn’t me leaving my mark on this world. It is certainly not me being everything I know I am…. I am extraordinary, I just know it, I always have been.

You are just like me, you feel it, don’t you? Won’t you join me and be extraordinary too… The great mother earth, our world and the women in it, need us to be more - more of everything we know we are already…. It’s time to surrender and unleash!

Everything we discuss here is covered in The Goddess Retreat - you are not alone, you never will be. Nothing you experience as a woman ever has to be misunderstood, never has to be left unforgiven… Begin your journey today and join us.  CLICK HERE for dates and details.

Yours Real and Raw

Janelle Manton

All Rights Reserved (C) 2011

Looking in the Mirror of Success?

How many times have you been in a situation that calls for you to look in the mirror, only to find the mirror is broken? You refuse to look at yourself for the answers but blame the world around you for what could have been stopped the moment you looked within. The blame game is no game at all…

What do I actually mean?  Well let’s suppose you are blamed for something that you feel you didn’t do and no matter how hard you try to defend your position you still get blamed. What then? How are these situations affecting your rate of Success? Your happiness? Your self esteem?

There are many times in life when things ‘happens’ to us and it’s a great time to really look in that proverbial mirror to see how what is happening, is a reflection of you or at least a part of you.  You see, nothing really happens to us, we create it, all of it.  So when the chips are down, look in the mirror and see what part of you is really at play. Every situation calls for you to reflect on the inside and own your part in the game that is going on around you. 

If you can imagine for a moment that you are the centre of the universe (and in some strange way you actually are), then doesn’t every situation call for your input? There is blame all around us, every day and so, the big question is: Are you the one pointing the finger or the person at the receiving end?  In any case both parties still need to look at themselves for the answers because there is always something to learn from every experience.

Whether this be the case in business or in your personal life, the only way to take full control of your life is by taking full responsibility for what ‘happens’ in it.  This was the case for me at a recent gathering with my family.  I was blamed for something I feel I had no part in but the truth be known, when I look closely at the other parties accusation, there was something in that for me ‘to get’ and I got it alright!  Now even though the accusation was incorrect, I could still look into the situation and gain some learning or knowledge that gave me insight into me.

It is said that perception is projection. So how you perceive something is how you are also projecting it to be.  That also means if you are projecting something out into the world, say like an opinion it is also only how you perceive it and not necessarily how anyone else may view it.  Is it yet another chance to look within?  There, inside of yourself, is where you find all the answers to life…..

So the good news is there is always something to learn, lessons come in a variety of shapes and colours and one of your greatest strengths is your ability to diffuse a situation by owning your part in it.

When it comes to being successful in what ever you choose to do, take a good look at how your beliefs and values are playing their part in holding you back. It could be time for an overhaul to get you doing more of what you really want in life…

So how do you do that? Even when you feel you did nothing wrong?

That’s the easy part.  Ask yourself the question, How is what is going on a reflection of how I really feel?  Identify with the part that you find most upsetting and see how that reflects your current situation or circumstance. If you feel uncomfortable or are in denial at all, here is where it will show up.  Become aware of how you feel and then act upon it.  Sometimes a quick phone call to the people involved can resolve and dissolve an issue before it gets out of hand.  There is quite often a misunderstanding or someone’s real feelings at the end of the blame game, so be open to ‘getting it’, understanding it and moving through it before all hell breaks loose.

A values checkin is always helpful and that is where a coach can guide you through to assist you in aligning more with what is impotant to you in life.

So what happens if you fail to see how the situation is a reflection of you or your true feelings or the Mirror is Broken?  Nothing happens but you may well continue to have these ’situations’ show up till you do understand what it is you need to learn.  Success comes to those who are most willing to be themselves, authenticity and by speaking your truth.  Life is like that and mother-nature is relentless when we need to learn something… It will keep showing up in all areas of your life and get bigger and bigger till you take the lessons and implement them by making changes to your life.

What are some of the keys to really understand this concept?

• Know yourself and be courageous enough to ask the hard question of yourself - How is this a reflection of me and how I feel?… You are a work in progress so be open to learning and looking within.
• Set clear boundaries. People will only treat you as you allow them, so with some effective communication and some ‘I feel’ statements you can have the kind of relationships you deserve with everyone in your life.
• Take the higher ground and stay out of someone else’s argument. If the other person has a vendetta against you, do not buy into their story, it could be about them and what they are projecting outward. Certainly reflect on how you are involved but do not put fuel on the fire by ‘getting into’ with them.
• Be compassionate with your understanding of the other person involved and try to see the world with their eyes, if only for a second. You may be surprised at what you see.
• Be open to learning something new at all times and even more willing to do something different to get a new and more positive outcome. There is always one waiting for you.

Success comes when you are clear about your intentions, what you want, how you show up and what you are willing to do to get it. Be your own best coach and when you have utilised all of your own resources, consider it time to get a coach to assist you. Gaining real clarity and opening the window within is easier for those who ask how.

I have been coaching for over 6 years and assist women to get what they want out of life. Be it more from their relationships, their careers or to have a fabulously loving relationship with yourself, I am here to help, so call and find out how coaching can help you. 1300 88 69 82

Women doing it their own way. Pay it forward!!!

Hi dear friends,

I just finished an incredible weekend working on the ‘Breakthrough to Success’ weekend with Chris Howard.  Many of you may know that I am a Master Performance Coach for this organisation and I say with great pride, what a pleasure it is to be part of such an incredible company that values quality contribution and education.

I was fortunate enough to be able to articulate in front of the whole group (of about 800 people) my greatest breakthrough - that being, as a ’single mum’ able to heal and manage my emotional states to the point of feeling gratitude, and the multitude of skills and strategies I’ve learnt and implemented’ to create wealth and a secure income for myself and children.

As a mum doing it on her own, I’ve gone about raising my kids as best I can- like any mother would do. I mean, I’ve just done what I had to do in order to keep my kids safe, fed and with good health. My only goal at one stage in my past, was to get out of the Centrlink circus so I could feel and be independent, so I set about achieving that outcome with massive determination. I was going to do what ever it took to move forward, increase my self esteem and feel personal pride once again….  I had no idea that my ’speaking out’ would have such a huge positive impact on the many mums and other women ‘out there’ doing it on their own.

Over the course of the weekend I was approached by many women, some just wanted to hug me and say thankyou for inspiring them and giving them hope.  Others asked, how did I do it, make it through to the otherside of happiness and success…?

My answer is this:

SELF BELIEF and SELF LOVE - I know I am worthy of such a precious gift
DETERMINATION - I know I deserve more and will stop at nothing to succeed and contribute to my family’s and others happiness
EDUCATION - I knew I needed more, so went after it with serious conviction
COMMITMENT - I knew I needed to decide what I wanted instead, so I made a promise to never stop until I succeed (what ever that means to me)
SUPPORT - I realised I had to surround myself with successful people, so I set about networking and meeting new people who would empower me and hold me to a higher standard
FEROCIOUS COMMITMENT TO MY PERSONAL GROWTH AND DEVELOPMENT - I know I will never stop expanding who I am, uncovering my limitations and blasting them away, so I can have more of everything I desire and want…

My journey is far from complete, I believe, once you start on the path to being empowered and inspired, you can never stop, just like you can’t unlearn something you’ve learnt. Once you reach a new paradigm of thinking , I believe you have a natural desire to want more. And so it goes….

If you know a mum who is doing it on her own, then please share this will her, get her tapped into this resource, support her in moving forward by encouraging her involvement. I could never have gotten this far without the help of many incredible people who gave of themselves. I am indebted, grateful and full of love because of the decisions I made sometime ago. I now appreciate the magnitude of my limitlessness…

A few questions to get you thinking about what next:

WHAT WOULD YOU BE DOING IF YOU HAD NO LIMITING BOUNDARIES?

WHAT WOULD IT REALLY TAKE FOR YOU TO GET INSPIRED TO GROW AND MOVE FORWARD?

WHAT WOULD IT TAKE FOR YOU TO TAKE ACTION, RIGHT NOW?

WHAT ARE YOU THANKFUL AND GRATEFUL FOR?

WHAT DO YOU DESERVE THAT YOU DON’T FEEL YOU CURRENTLY HAVE?

HOW LONG ARE YOU GOING TO WAIT TO GET IT? Now is the time!

It’s time to go out into the world and start asking the right questions. Ask for help. Ask someone who is already doing what you want to do to mentor you and assist you in getting a start. Tap into FREE resources, Teleseminars, webinars, eBooks etc. There are plenty of people in the world just waiting to help another…..
All you have to do is decide on what it is you want from now on! Now don’t get me wrong, there is much I had to actually do myself, I was a willing particpant in my personal growth. The journey is not one you can sit back and watch - it requires your full participation.

I am very grateful for this past weekend. I have learnt that I should be speaking out much more often, that my contribution is of great value to many women, especially mothers. Thank you to those men and women who were there walking with me and sometimes holding my hand…..

I will now ‘pay it forward’!!!

I INVITE YOU TO REGISTER FOR MY ‘LOSE THE BITCH, LET’S GET RICH’ Teleseminar next week. It’s totally FREE for you, just because!

Can I ask you to ‘PAY IT FORWARD’ and invite your girlfriends along to join in - it could be just what they need to feel supported, inspired and motivated!

With warm regard and so much love…
Yours, Real and Raw,
Janelle Manton
Director
Top Secret Women’s Business